Barefoot And Pregnant
by VisualIDentificationZeta
Summary: HarmSinger SUMMARY: he has her right where he wants her.... COMPLETE


TITLE: Barefoot And Pregnant

AUTHOR: Vid Z.

PAIRING: Harm/Singer

CATEGORY: Fluff, Humor

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc of the TV show JAG are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fic. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I've just finished reading Jen's amazing HarmMeg fic 'Forever' and I'm ashamed to admit that I almost had tears in my eyes. The premise was Meg having been killed and Harm being the one to investigate her murder. The author was an amazing writer, much better than I can ever hope to be, and the way she wrote Harm's feelings throughout the fic was extremely powerful. It's a highly recommended read (I think it can still be found on Ex Libris via Wayback Machine) and if you know even a little something about me you'll know it's also a safe read (I always check endings before reading a fic). So, I decided to finish this already-started fic because I needed something light and bright. So, here it is.

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SUMMARY: he has her right where he wants her.

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"Well, well, well. Who would've thought." Harm drawled, making her jump.

When she calmed down she waddled over to him and gave him a welcome-home kiss, then went back to what she'd been doing. While mixing the dough she turned back to him. "What did you mean by that?"

His eyes caressed her large, swollen belly where their child was growing, just as his hands had moments ago before she'd stepped away.

A few months ago she'd finally realized that he couldn't keep his hands off her belly for 10 minutes while off-duty (which always led to some very pleasurable physical activity) so she'd started wearing low riding bottoms with belly-showing tops so he had an immediate access to it without the shirt getting in the way. The shirts that had gotten in the way before had many times ended up ripped when passion had taken them over. This arrangement had a bad side to it... their electricity bill had risen.

And ever since she'd entered her 6 month she'd been asking herself as to the futility of even putting on clothes at the apartment anymore, as they were all over each other much of the time.

For some weird reason the larger she got the friskier he was.

Not that she minded.

Okay, so she was right behind him in the frisky business, barely keeping her hands off him. The pregnancy didn't just give her the crying-at-the-drop-of-a-hat and the I'm-gonna-tear-your-head-off-without-a-reason hormones, but the I-wanna-make-love-day-and-night hormones too. Neither complained.

Even now they had to have the kitchen island between them to prevent them from jumping each other. She did want to finish what she was doing after all.

When he didn't answer immediately she turned towards him and demanded. "Well?" The raised eyebrow completed the image.

Harm grinned at her wolfishly and she shivered at the heat in his eyes.

She'd forgotten what he'd told her while they'd still been dating, that she turned him on when she was angry or annoyed. He was terribly affected when she was glaring at him, her eyes flashing, her cheeks flushed, her hands on her hips. He knew it was strange, but the passion and fire she displayed when riled just had him want to take her to bed and ravish her until she could walk no more.

"Well, 'what'?" he mimicked her.

She huffed, trying, but not succeeding in hiding her smile. It would just encourage him. "What did you want to say?"

"Oh, that." he leaned against the other side of the island, his voice dropping a few registers.

"Yes, that." she was really trying not to get annoyed, but it was a hard fight.

"Just that I finally have you where I've always wanted you. Barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen." he kept his face serious.

Loren was stunned speechless and red was slowly starting to descend on her eyes when he suddenly grinned mischeviously.

She gasped at his audacity, furious at herself for falling for it. Harm was as far away from being a chauvinist or a sexist as possible and she'd fallen for it... Okay, at least she could blame her hormones on getting upset easily.

But she was Loren and a Rabb now and she could dish back as well as he could.

She pushed far enough away from the island so he could see her belly and started rounding it slowly, all the while trailing a fingernail over her bump down to just above the apex of her thighs slowly. His eyes were rivetted to the sight and she smirked triumphantly.

"Oh, that's too bad." she purred seductively.

"Why?" he croaked with a dry throat.

She plastered herself all over him, her big belly nudging his lower belly, her full breasts smashed against his chest, her arms around his neck and her lips to his ear. She could feel the powerful shiver go through his body as her breath hit his ear and sensitive neck and smirked once again.

"Because _I _don't have _you _where I want you." she murmured throatily, in the voice that she knew made him react instantly. She smiled smugly as she immediately felt something hard and big prod her lower abdomen.

"And where is that?" when she'd put her arms around him he'd automatically slouched so she didn't have to stretch, but his arms had still slipped around her body and his hands were keeping up a tender massage of her lower back, which he knew had to be aching from her position, even with him having gone down to her level.

She moaned from the relief his skilled fingers provided and the sound brought out a corresponding one from him.

"In the bed naked, making love to me without a break and making babies like on a conveyor belt."

She could feel the guffaws rumbling through his chest before they even entered his throat and had to hold on as he was shaking from laughter. She laughed too and hid her face into his chest.

"But if you promise not to tell anyone I'll confess to something." she spoke into his uniform jacket.

"Scout's honor." Harm swore.

Loren frowned. "You were never a Scout..."

He grinned sheepishly. "Oh, right. Anyway, I promise not to tell a living soul about it."

She pretended to think about it for a long time, until Harm started tickling her.

"Okay, okay! I'd be outed from the holy sisterhood and every feminist on the planet would be out for my blood for admitting this, but ever since the morning sickness and the constant exhaustion had stopped I've been enjoying being pregnant. It's an amazing spiritual and emotional, life altering experience, that makes me feel so much closer to nature. And the thing all my former feminist sisters would kill me for is that I'm loving the idea of doing my part in fulfilling the most primal instinct that exists in every living being: to propagate and help further the species even though the human species would still be too numerous for this planet to sustain even if the entire world except for China stopped having babies. I'm also already thinking that I would like to have more than one baby with you, something like two or three. Anyway, I could also be talking that way cause you're taking such a wonderful care of me and loving me so much, besides all the amazing sex we've been having, that it makes me completely forget the fact that I can't see my feet anymore, that my ankles are swollen constantly, that I can't get off the couch without help, that I look like a beached whale,... But I still wouldn't trade this, the pregnancy; the baby and most importantly you, for the world."

Harm was silent for a few minutes and the only response she got was the tightening of his arms around her. Still, it told her everything she needed to know, that he was moved speechless, that he agreed and that he loved her.

Finally he spoke up. She could hear the grin in his voice. "Well, even though this one is still in the dry dock, waiting to be launched, named and commissioned, what do you say we go practice making some more, Mrs Rabb?"

She pulled back with a sultry grin that took his breath away. "I say: lead on, Mr Rabb."

Harm reached out to turn off the oven that'd been heating up and then quickly scooped up his very pregnant wife, eliciting a startled shriek from her.

The only complaint he received was Loren's warning of his one weakness. "Harm, your back! I'm too heavy!"

He ignored it and carried her off to the bedroom where they proceeded to practice that age-old dance, completely forgetting about dinner.

Loren now had HIM right where she wanted him.

THE END

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It's really annoying to get 200 hits and no reviews. You can't be that lazy! Otherwise I'll just PM new fics to those who DO review and I've got another fic ready to post, longer than any I've ever written and IMHO also the best.

So, review, even if to just say 'Hey I read it', to give me motivation to continue writing and posting.


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